Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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