I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize