i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
My vagina is officially offended.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Randomize
