I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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