Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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