I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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