just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
