Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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