There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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