it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I have feelings that need drinking.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
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