nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
