just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize