you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize