I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Fuck appropriateness.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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