State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
