I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
