you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
