Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
