i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
