if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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