I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
