i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
