Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
