I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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