My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
