I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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