Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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