At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
