Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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