He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
