Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I think people are normalizing furries
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
