Rock
Scissors
Fuck
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize