Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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