Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
