I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
