i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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