I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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