So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
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Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
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I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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