NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize