You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize
