I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
