her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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