found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
