we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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