Yo dont text me then not text me
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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