tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize