Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
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