please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
