there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
