thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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