Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
