I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
